Today, in most of the families in India , both the parents
are employed due to economic necessity or due to the desire
and willingness to work. So the children need someone to look
after them when the parents are not around. But that is not
all.
The elders should take on the role of an active grandparent,
and not only give the grandchildren love and affection but
also instil in them a sense of responsibility, moral values
and teach them to face the world and its realities.
While it is true that elders should correct the youngsters
when they are wrong, what happens invariably is that older
people tend to keep on preaching. They must realise that today's
lifestyle is far removed from theirs and they should accept
that.
They should give more independence to both their children
and the grandchildren. This way the youngsters will come to
respect and love them. They should not expect affection on
demand, they should earn it!
When grandparents feel that their own children do not know
what is right for the grandchildren, can they interfere?
This is a mistaken presumption of elders, comparing the present
times with their own. As far as possible they should not interfere
in the way in which the grandchildren are being brought up.
Their role should be only that of an advisor when advice is
sought. Infact in most families it is the grandparent
who become the mediator between the parents and the children.
In today's world, Indians have spread out far and wide and
this has created a huge physical distance between the grandparent
and the grandchild. But they can always keep in touch by telephone
or by writing letters.
In this context, e-mail is the greatest link. Elders need
not own a computer. There are internet (computer) centres
all over India.
It is quite easy to learn basic computing and e-mail. providing
much needed self-assurance that their near and dear are only
a few clicks away.